The Hair-wash Honour Lesson

One of the things I can't do for myself with my POTS medical condition is washing my hair, so I have to get someone else to do it for me.

My recliner wheelchair is 'reversed' over the edge of the shower and with a hand-held shower rose, while I am lying down, my hair is washed.

Yesterday's hairwash turned out to be an "Honour Lesson" as our maid who also serves as my Personal Carer/Assistant on the days she comes, was telling me about a very interesting situation as she lathered and rinsed my hair...... and I want to share it with you.

A lady did something 'not nice' to her brothers. We'll say, she sinned against her brothers.  

She would say she is a Christian.

She has recognised that what she did was wrong.  

She knows there is a problem in her relationship with her brothers because of it.

She knows that without forgiveness there will continue to be a problem between them.

However,

She is older than all her brothers.

Culturally, a person does not put themselves in a 'shamed' position in the eyes of others, and definitely an older person will never 'lower themselves' to look shameful in the eyes of those younger than them.

An older person culturally is in a position of honour simply because they are older and they are not about to voluntarily step down or 'let go' of any of that honour.

So she is saying that she cannot go to her brothers to ask for forgiveness for the wrong she has done.

But she has heard that her brothers are willing to forgive her.

So she is now saying that because she is the older sibling, it is not her 'place' culturally to go to her younger brothers and ask for forgiveness, they must come to her and just tell her that they have forgiven her without her having to say or do anything.  She is trying to exert her cultural 'elder' position to enable her to avoid the 'shame' she feels she will bring on herself by having to come to her brothers.  And she is telling them that culturally they should be doing what she tells them.

BUT

Her brothers have said that as much as they are willing to forgive her, they are not willing to give her that forgiveness until she comes and asks for it.

So there is a stalemate!

As my carer rinsed the shampoo from my hair she said "Its the Honour/Shame culture again".

Biblically the brothers are doing it right. We should have a heart of forgiveness ready and willing to give it.  In other words we should have already willingly 'granted' it in our hearts so that we can without hesitation 'give' it when it is asked for.  However, the person also needs to come prepared to admit their sin and ask for forgiveness - we see that pattern in 1 John 1:9 about us coming to God for forgiveness "if we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive...." and in Luke 17: 4 in relation to forgiving other people "if he sins against you seven times in the day and turns to you seven times saying "I repent", you must forgive him". And then there is 2 Chronicles 7:14"If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land". The pattern is that God is a forgiving God who is willing and ready to forgive IF with a repentant heart, we come to him for forgiveness. So we should have the same willingness whenever anyone comes to us for forgiveness. 

There has to be a humbling of oneself, an admittance of wrong doing and a sense of putting oneself at the mercy of another in the hope and trust that they will grant the forgiveness, if it to be received.  Conversely, if we are going to forgive as God forgives, we must not withhold forgiveness in attitude of heart, or in action toward other human beings if they in repentance ask for it.

But this lady, even as a 'Christian' is struggling to come to terms with the requirements that God asks for (humility), as those terms intersect and conflict with cultural ways.  

And as my Motswana carer said "It's all about pride".

We are learning that true biblical forgiveness is something that is not well understood here particularly because of the cultural honour/shame dynamics.  And even for Christians, there is much cultural thinking super-imposed onto biblical words and concepts. May God continue to grant us the wisdom and strength to research and write materials and opportunities to share, so that hearts may be set free from Satan's bondage which keeps them separated from a rich and loving relationship with God and with their fellowman.

Avocado Experiment

Here's a bit of a "part 2" to the "Dried Out" blog post....

One of the major issues visitors to Botswana face is the problem of
dehydration.

The air is so dry (today's humidity is only 6%!), so you don't notice
perspiration - it basically just instantly evaporates - so you don't
realise how much water your body is losing.

Once you have lived here for more than a year you begin to notice the
effect on your skin as well - dry skin, cracked feet, cracked lips,
and dry eyes are all a part of life here and extra care has to be taken.

About three weeks back we put an avocado on the counter. But
although ripe and ready to eat, since it had some 'patches' on it that
looked like it might not be the tastiest avocado, of the ones we had
at the time, it got left till last to be eaten. Meanwhile it had
already started to 'shrivel'. So I decided to continue to leave it
out on the counter and just watch it 'dry up'.

We don't really need fruit dehydrator machines here, we just leave it
on the counter top!

I thought you might like to see what happens to an avocado after
sitting on the counter for three weeks in Botswana!

So I placed them on the window sill so I had a nice white background
and recorded the result of my experiment and put it alongside another
fresh one of a similar size to the original size of my shrivelled one,
for you to compare!

(In Brisbane Australia, it would have just gone rotten and mouldy -
but here is just shrank and dried out to less than half its original
size!)

Only Dots on the Rocks!

As a follow up to Round Rainbow.....

Did we get rain?

No. Well yes if a few drops counts!

We will often 'smell' rain coming and then all that happens is a few
drops fall -

The drops were so few you could count the dots they made on the rocks
of our garden edging.....

That Sun Halo really made the internet busy - at least in the Southern
African area anyhow as people posted photos on Facebook and sent
photos all over the world.

Our maid was telling us that whole inner city buildings emptied as
people went outside to see it.

Apparently people were asking "Is Jesus Returning?" "Are we ready?"

Anything that gets people asking such questions is certainly a good
thing, whether the raindrops come or not.

But .....we keep praying for rain... more than just 'dots on the rocks'!

Round Rainbow!

I just had a phone call from a friend who teaches at one of the Private Schools here in Gaborone and a text message come in on my phone as well from another friend saying "Quick, go look at the sun!"  My teacher friend said everyone is outside at the school, taking a look.

Well without commenting on the danger of standing looking into the sun for too long, after putting on my sunglasses and taking a quick look up - what an amazing unexpected sight greeted me!

It was 11am, a low 10% humidity, already 33 degrees Celcius, and the sky was covered with a continuous layer of very very thin wispy clouds like a fine netting across what is normally blue, turning it a strange eerie whitish light grey.

And I look up and see an amazing sight!

This is no small ring around the sun - this is HUGE....so huge that I'm struggling to get the whole circle in with my camera on the widest angle lens setting I have.  As I hold up a ruler about 40 centimetres from my face, the ring measures approximately 30cm across!

It's like a type of round rainbow as the sunlight passes through the moisture (ice crystals apparently) of those thin wispy clouds.

In actual fact its called a  22^° Sun Halo

I took this second photo below a few minutes later of the full circle through the wire we have strung above our porch area in the hope our bougainvillea (which you can see just in the corner of the photograph), will grow across it.  The wires are about 2.5 metres above the ground and about 20cm apart

To give you another idea of how big this halo was - if I stretched out my arm and did a hand-span, from one horizon to the other is about 9 of my hand-spans and this halos was two hand-spans across (diameter) - right above my head.

....it felt like a giant 'flying saucer' hovering above, since the colour inside the halo was a great deal darker than the surrounding sky.

- about an hour later - the whole sky is now mostly blue with a few patchy wisps of clouds and the dark 'centre' of the halo ring is gone and the outside 'ring' itself is also almost faded completely.

Thank you Lord for the opportunity to experience such an awesome and not so usual sight!

Apart from the fun and interest of seeing such a thing, it is said because of the type of cloud (cirrus) it happens with, it often precedes some storms a few days later!  

Well we do need the rain that's for sure.

'Been thinking about.....ZZZZzzzzzz

Sleep!

It's a basic necessity of life, and more of a necessity than we often realise.

I've been learning some things about sleep recently that have been a challenge to me that I thought I might share more widely....

While Scripture tells us we shouldn't love sleep too much, it also tells us that God "gives His beloved sleep"

I used to wonder at this verse, and puzzle over why, if God says He gives us sleep, that on some occasions I found it hard to sleep?

I have come to realise that more than specific occasions to question God (maybe he wanted me awake to pray??), it is a verse that reminds me that the daily factor of 'sleep' in our lives is, in and of itself a 'gift'.  Our bodies can't function without it.

Then recently when our 'prodigal son' confessed faith in Christ, one of the things that he said had changed for him was that he said he was now sleeping, and sleeping peacefully and soundly, like he never had before.  I was reminded that 'in Christ', if we are willing, we have the opportunity to trust our Heavenly Father, rest in Him and know His peace in our sleep, at a level that many in this world cannot even begin to enjoy.

In addition to these facts, (as we often seemed to be a broken record to our student sons about the need to sleep and not just be up reading and studying at all hours of the night), I began to learn more about this amazing daily period of shut-eye that is part of every human being's life.

I'll call them my sleep 'half-dozen'!!

I learnt that:

1. God created sleep and created us to need sleep, and a certain amount of sleep - so to try to defy that, is actually defying and dishonouring God's design for us.

2. Essentially God gives a kind of sleep to His beloved children, that one who is unsaved and/or carrying all their burdens of sin on their own shoulders, cannot fully know.

3. God tells us not to love sleep too much - we need to work if we are going to eat (Proverbs 20:13)

4. God also tells us that we have to keep the truth of point '3' in balance, and not become workaholics and deprive ourselves of sleep because we have become obsessive about 'getting money' to 'get more stuff'! (Psalm 127:1,2)  It is in this context that God tells us that He gives His beloved sleep. We need to remember that God created sleep and has given it as a gift - a blessing - to our bodies.  We should neither abuse or refuse that gift.

5. Rather than be quick to 'blame' God for the times I didn't sleep well, I have discovered that often times, there were basic elements of my life that I needed to change, because they were affecting my ability to sleep.  Therefore like any health issue, I should seek out ways to better take care of this 'tent' (body) God has given me for the time He has put me on this earth.

6.  Our modern lifestyle has much in it that threatens (and often succeeds) in 'stealing' our sleep. From diet to computers, and stress. The articles (with links below) that I have been reading give examples such as the light of our computer screens will be detrimental to our sleep if we are exposed to it within an hour of bed.   I should be considering these factors if I want to honour God and the gift He has given of 'sleep', by taking care of my body as the dwelling place of His Holy Spirit and the vessel of His work/ministry, and making sure I let it get the sleep it needs.

To conclude, I have come to realise that if I am to have my mind fully available to God to use for His purposes, I have to be responsible to keep it in the best working order I am able to.  I also have come to realise the significant truth that if I do not give my body sufficient sleep, so that its more difficult for me to engage my mind and have it 'fully available' to the Lord, my lack of bodily discipline is actually quenching the ability of the Holy Spirit to produce His fruit in and through me - such as self-control and loving others.  If I am honest with myself...when I am tired its much harder to have self-control, to speak with grace, or to think of the needs of others, because all my 'brain energy' is taken with just keeping myself functioning!

Our modern world, from the electric light to the internet and smart phone, has made life so helpful in so many ways. But you know, I am also quite rebuked, corrected and instructed, as I study sleep in the light of God's word and my calling to walk worthy of the Lord - honouring and glorifying Him. It's hard to say 'no' to people's demands and technology's temptations!  Technological 'helps' can be a massive 'hindrance' as well, and if I don't keep them well in their place as 'servants' rather than their tendency to want to 'master' me and 'take over' my life (1 Corinthians 6:12), I will dishonour the Lord instead of bringing glory to Him. 

Oh Lord help me to honour You with my sleep!

In my 'research' about sleep I came across various bits of information that I found very helpful...so I thought I should share them with you....

Click here for a link with some interesting information on our need for sleep and what we should and should not do to maximise our sleep.

Click here for interesting results of a sleep study done a couple of years ago by the National Sleep Foundation in the USA and their tips for better sleep

Click here for some latest research about the importance of sleep for the health of our brains - and click here for a video clip about the same research 

Click here for some more fascinating information about what happens to your body as you sleep 

 (*although.... for an interesting aside on this last link - it says under the heading of 'blood' that our heart-rate drops 10-30 beats per minute when we are asleep - with my Dysautonomia/POTS my heart-rate was not going down at all while I was asleep, instead it was going quite high! No wonder, my body and brain were struggling! It was like I was at the gym all day and all night!....I praise the Lord that my 'sleep' heart-rate has been coming down and now after 3.5 years it is at least mostly about equal if not just a little lower than my day-time resting heart rate...and while some of that improvement has come through some medication/supplements, some of it has also come from learning how to better prepare myself for good sleep, rather than hinder good sleep by what I do in the evening hours - in consideration of some of the information in those articles above).

(sleep deprivation poster photo from Kids in Australia )