...thinking some more about the honour of old age

Ageing. Getting older. 

This week my wonderful Grandma reaches 95!

So in a way this post is in her honour! 

She is someone who has embraced her age at each stage and although she for sure has found her increasing frailness difficult to accept at times, she has been a true example to me of truly growing old gracefully.

In the Western world, growing old is seen as something to avoid - at least to avoid the appearance of it.

Old age is 'delayed', 'disguised' and 'despised' as one writer put it!

We are obsessed with not looking like we are growing old. You can get face-lifts, dye your hair so it will never appear to 'go grey', buy anti-wrinkle cream, get 'granny wart' skin growths burnt off etc etc.

We are also obsessed with showing that an older person can do just as much as a younger person - so we have the Master's Games, and University for the Older generation.   We applaud when someone in their 80s is on 'Facebook'.

Now I certainly do not disagree with an older person desiring to continue in sports or take up a new sport, or to take up some new study or want to take care of their skin. But I am concerned if people are doing these things because they don't want to feel like they are getting old.  And I am concerned that the 'world' assesses the elderly as 'better' if they are seen to not be letting age 'overtake' them.

There is a view that 'old people' have a lower quality of life and so to maintain a good quality of life one must 'do' these things to still look/feel like they are achieving.

I think this is partly because of our Western understanding of honour.  In the West we don't talk a lot about honour, but its there, subltly lingering in the shadows.  

Honour is not just about achieving more.

The honour which functions in Western society tends to function on an achieved level more than an ascribed level....and thus old age doesn't carry with it much (if any) honour just from being 'elderly'.  So we have created this mentality that even an older person has to keep 'achieving' to be honoured. . . . . . . . . . . this is in contrast to the traditional view of the culture around me in Africa. 

Traditionally there has been great respect for the elderly here (sadly that is changing, no thanks to the West and media most probably).  There was honour simply in being old, as it was realised how much experience and wisdom the elderly had about the affairs of life. (Now it is true that some of that is related to traditional religious views relating to ancestors, but none-the-less there still was respect for the elderly.)

But even in the 'achieved honour' area, The West, as a society, has allowed the lack of honour for motherhood on its own as achieving anything very high up the ranking scale, to flow over even into the role of grand-parenting.  

Oh its not that we Westerners ignore grand-parents, but we often don't see grand-parents as anything more than baby-sitters.  And maybe grandparents aren't as involved in the general lives of their children and grand-children because they themselves are often still both working.

I look back on my childhood with rare affection, the many memories I have and the mountain of 'stuff' I learnt by interacting with my grandparents in a myriad of settings.

As I have now moved into the 'grand-parent' zone, and see my own mum enjoying a new season in her life of 'older age' and have my last grand-parent now entering her 96th year, I am more and more realising how little our Western world has come to not value older age - to the detriment of the generations to come.

BUT it seems, that despite the 'world's' general perception that old age is a bad season of life, those actually in old age are experiencing something different.

A great Wall Street Journal article  came across my 'desk' a while back which shows in some recent studies, older people are actually much more content and happy and positive than we may have been led to believe - it is not a zone to be feared and avoided at all costs. A few myths are well busted in the article.  The article is commented on further by another blogpost which summarises the few 'myths' and their realities:

1. Myth: Depression is more prevalent in old age.
   Fact: "In general, when we look at older adults, they tend to be happier, less anxious, less angry and tend to adapt well to their circumstances."
2. Myth: Cognitive decline is inevitable.
   Fact: ". . . barring dementia, older adults perform better in the real world than they do on cognitive tests."
3. Myth: Older workers are less productive.
   Fact: "The economists determined that over that four-year period, the older workers committed slightly fewer severe errors, while the younger workers' severe error rates edged up."
4. Myth: Loneliness is more likely.
   Fact: "Older adults typically report better marriages, more supportive friendships, less conflict with children and siblings and closer ties with members of their social networks than younger adults."
5. Myth: Creativity declines with age.
   Fact: "Creative genius clusters in to two categories: conceptual artists, who tend to do their best work in their 20s and 30s, and experimental artists, who often need a few more decades to reach full potential."
6. Myth: More exercise is better.
   Fact: "Stick to a moderate cardiovascular workout of no more than 30 miles (of running) a week or 50 to 60 minutes of vigorous exercise a day, and take at least one day off each week."

I do not deny that all of us have to come to terms with certain 'losses' in old age. But if our society - which starts with you and me -  started to celebrate more what older people are good at and the unique ways they can bless others, rather than expect them to achieve in the same ways as those younger, then maybe we would all be better for it.

After all, Scripture gives us direction that older folk are meant to be valued for the richness of life that they can bring.  They are meant to be sharing God's grace by teaching their grandkids about history and about God's faithfulness over the long haul.  If we are to honour what God honours, then the younger generation is supposed to welcome that input and value and honour the older generation.

(see Proverbs 20:29, Job 12:12, Deuteronomy 4:9)

(Could I also suggest that if we don't like the idea of growing older we run the danger of being so absorbed in our own self-youth-preservation through trying to avoid the realities of ageing, ignoring the signs, and escaping the reminders, that we miss out on the joys of celebrating that stage of life and benefiting the younger generations....and the younger generations who don't value ageing are depriving themselves of wisdom and knowledge that can be gained - and are thus defrauding their culture and society from having the benefit of such knowledge and wisdom in years to come.)

So…….

• What can you do to encourage and honour an older person?  

• In what ways could you factor in time for you and your kids to spend time with older people (not least grandparents) so as to benefit and learn from the richness of their wisdom and life experiences?

• In what ways could you promote in your circle, a better attitude and respect for the elderly and opportunities to 'hear' them and learn from them.... and bust a few more myths out there?

• And if you are in the 'older' zone, in what ways can you think differently about your situation and even more boldly embrace aging and give thanks to the Lord for the journey He has taken you on and the ways He has grown you and blessed you?  In what ways can you then embrace in a new way the opportunities for all the richness you have to give to those around you?

Vale Sir Quett Masire, Botswana's former President

Today was the Memorial Service for Botswana's much loved former President Sir Quett Masire who passed away last week aged 91.

He was Botswana's second President after Independance, from 1980 to 1998 and remained very much involved in community endeavours within Botswana, and other issues and initiatives in Africa.

As a way to have you know a little about this man, and honour his life and contribution to this country, here are a few clips from tributes pasted on Facebook:

"He had the knowledge of the country, of the status of Batswana at that time. He knew their values, value systems, idioms, he knew about botho, about the importance of not doing things that were shameful to yourself, your kgotla, and your community. He also concentrated on the idea of mmualebe--that people should be allowed to speak. His sense of humour and sense if understanding all people in Botswana, and his ability to communicate with people was what took us forward in terms of concepts and ideas that people did not appreciate at the beginning." 

 - Former Vice President Dr. Ponatshego Kedikilwe

"I think Rre Masire has a way of handling people—he is straightforward, he laughs. When you go to a meeting or an event, you don't say, "have you seen Masire somewhere?" because you just need to listen. He will be with people, just laughing. You just hear this laugh and know where he is. You couldn't miss his voice and laugh. You hear him through the door. He made everybody feel that they were part of it, there were no strangers at BDP meetings". 

 - Former long-serving Cabinet Minister and Member of Parliament Dr. Gaositswe Chiepe

"I saw Masire for the first time as a teenager at a political rally in the 1960s. He had the charisma, people would come and follow his rallies. This man had the gift of the gab, when he addressed meetings at kgotla you just had to listen. What I loved about him was that when you asked questions, even provocative, he would never allow himself to be provoked. He would never dodge questions, no matter how potent. He also had a way of addressing annoying people in a manner that even the person asking the question would laugh at themselves. I loved the way he talked to these people. I always wondered why he could not convince his own people, the Bangwaketse, to vote for him. It annoys me why people of the same feather cannot support their own." 

 - Former Speaker of the National Assembly Margaret Nasha

"When journalists ask me what made Botswana an economic and democratic success story, I always explain it in two words--Quett Masire. He is an amazing person who I admire more than anyone in the world" 

 - Former Bank of Botswana Governor Quill Hermans

According to the Huffington Post, he was a leading figure in the independence movement and though he was Botswana's longest serving president, he is credited for introducing the two-term limits and automatic succession by the deputy in case the president retires.

Following the death of President Seretse Khama in 1980, Masire oversaw a period of unprecedented economic growth. He is regarded as the man who anchored Botswana's stability.

 - from the Deutsche Welle (DW)(German Public Broadcaster) @ http://www.dw.com/…/former-botswana-president-ke…/a-39383352

 (Credit (Screenshot photo and tributes) : Facebook)

To 'meet' the man and hear him speak, you might like to watch the 3 part interview on Youtube with Sir Quett Ketumile Masire here and here and here

We've been invaded by little red bugs!

They seem to be everywhere as soon as we walk out the door.

Little red bugs ranging in size from about 3mm….to 

maybe around 12mm with their wings starting to grow.

Even the giant ants have to crawl over these red bugs to get where they are going….

They are swarming over the road and the gravel driveway, 

they are on the dirt or among the leaves

they are climbing the trees, 

They are on tree roots

they are in cement crevasses

they are all over the rock walls, 

they are on the front porch, they are on the plants….millions of them!

We have seen them in previous years but not this many.

So I did a 'google' on 'red bugs'.

And although there seems to be a bit of a discrepency as to whether they are:

1. an insect of the family 'Pyrrhocoridae' and genus Dysdercus (often called Cotton Stainers of which the nymphs have black heads which my little bugs don't and the adults have white stripes underneath which mine don't) or genus Cenaeus (species Cenaus carnifex - who all seem to have some red on their legs which my little bugs don't)

 or

2. an insect of the family 'Rhopalidae' Rhopalidae Serinethinae to be exact,

And if I understand it right, both are of the Superfamily 'Pyrrhocoroidea' of true bugs.

There is no debate that they are a 'true bug'!

But from my searching, and matching my own photos, I think they are probably what is commonly called a Soapberry Bug, specifically the species Leptocoris Mutilatis of the Rhopalidae Serinethinae family.

The ones we are seeing by the millions are mostly the nymph stage of the bug.  I only spotted a couple of the adult version - of which you can just spot the 'orange/red' belly at the side under the wings

Below - in the shade - the adult colours (on left) are a little more interesting

Anyhow, at least we know that even if we humans have trouble telling them apart and knowing for sure what they are, God as Creator knows exactly what they are!

Meanwhile I had a bit of fun taking a closer look at the multitude of these tiny critters.

The Message of the Gospel: We are Saved from What?

Photo Credit - Creative Commons

This week was the inaugral Honor-Shame conference in Chicago, which due to unavoidable reasons we were not able to attend.

But it was to be 3 days of wonderful sessions, seminars and discussions with authors, professors, mission practicioners, researchers and others with the common interest of the vital relevance of honour-shame dynamics in Scripture to reaching our world with the gospel, not least those areas whose cultures are steeped in honour-shame dynamics.

The Gospel: its a term much used in evangelical circles of late.

And rightly so…..without the gospel - the good news - we are hopelessly lost for eternity.

However when we use the term 'the gospel' what do we mean?…what do we hope others will understand by it? Do we truly understand it?

Once again a passage of scripture 'jumped out at me' in a new way this morning as I read 'with my honor-shame' eyes open. This time in Romans chapter 10.  I find it is so easy to miss the obvious when we come to scripture with 'guilt-innocence' presumptions.

The gospel is all about rescue.  The good news is that a Saviour was born, died and rose again.  

But what did He come to save us from?

"Sin", you say.

Correct!

But…..

….what does John 3:16 say God sent His son into the world to do?

"give us eternal life"-

"whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life"

Yes, Correct again! but in this verse we are told that Jesus came to bring us eternal life so that we didn't have to….PERISH!  In other words we have been saved from 'death'.

"For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord" (Romans 6:23)

So its not just sin that we have been saved from, but the wages of sin, the inevitable results of sin—death. 

…and we Westerners understand that to mean that physical end of life when we stop breathing and then go to a place of forever physical torture where any sense of physical enjoyment of life is totally finished. But some other parts of the world, in fact the majority of the world, find relational death (full shaming by separation/rejection/isolation) more significant and severe than physical death.

But if we look again at Romans, this time in chapter 10, verses 9 then verse 11 then verse 13 we see what the Apostle Paul explains we are saved from.

In verse 9 and 13 he says what 'will' happen, and sandwiched between these two verses in verse 11 he says what 'will not' happen to us in the process of explaining the impact and effect of this salvation that 'will' happen to us.

Verse 9 says….we will be saved

Verse 11 says ….we will not be put to shame

Verse 13 says ….we will be saved

He doesn't say we will be saved from sin, or from guilt, or from hell, or from judgement or from death or from fear, as much as they may all be part of the 'rescue package'. Instead he does a commentary on a verse from the Old Testament in Isaiah 28:16 that talks about the 'rock of offence' that God has laid down and goes on to say that…

 "everyone who believes in Him will not be put to shame".

Paul is saying that to be saved, is to avoid being 'put to shame'. We are rescued according to Paul, from shame.

Remember it is also Paul who explains to us in Romans 3:23 that 

"all have sinned and come short of the glory of God".

In otherwords, the impact of the sin we are in is our not attaining (coming short of) the glory (honour) of God.  If we don't attain honour, by default, we are in the opposite state of shame.  

Honour lost, is shame gained.

We often think about Romans as a book about the law. However, the extensive treatment of the law that Paul gives us in Romans is not to have us think the gospel is all about the law. NO its about showing us that the law was only there to show us how far short we are of the standard we are supposed to be at if we are to have the honour of holiness that God created us to have when He made us in His image.

The law simply reveals our shame. The shame that points us to our sin.

So when we read in Daniel 12:2 that the contrast of eternal life is eternal shame, 

"And many of those who sleep in the dust of the earth shall awake, some to everlasting life, and some to shame and everlasting contempt."

or in another translation

"Many sleeping in the ground will wake up. Some will wake up to live forever, but others will wake up to be ashamed and disgraced forever." (God's Word translation)

...Paul is totally consistent with what God was saying all along. And to go back to the beginning, it is also totally consistent with the fact that lack of sin before the fall of mankind was described as a state of being 'naked and not ashamed.' (Genesis 2:25)

Sadly, the prosperity gospel has hijacked the African's natural inclination to see references to 'lack of shame' in Scripture.  'Lack of shame' is of great interest to a people who's lives are controlled in every dimension by an avoidance of shame.  But because we have brought a gospel as evangelicals that doesn't really touch the issue of shame, when the prosperity gospel promises that they 'will not be put to shame' in an earthly cultural sense and instead will be given the honour of wealth and good health/healing, the erroneous teaching is embraced with great eagerness.

The gospel is the good news, that is true.  But it is the good news primarily that Jesus came to be 'our rock of offence' - the spotless, holy and innocent One who endured all shame not just from those on earth but also from His father in heaven….so that He could rescue us from the eternal shame (separation/rejection) that we deserved.

We will be saved…..because we will not be shamed!

Shame lost, is honour gained.

Like Adam and Eve before the fall, we will stand once again unashamed, this time clothed in the honour robes of Jesus Christ our Saviour!

This is the message of the Gospel!